The Tao of Gaming Gaming with Little Miss

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[Brian, Sunday January 8, 2006 at 5:11pm]

Gaming with Little Miss

On New Years, I told my daughter that she was probably old enough to play "Daddy's Games." Needless to say, she beemed with pride. We've mainly been playing Settlers of Catan (with Jacqui); she wins often. It's a forgiving game, given the dice and that Jacqui and I will rob each other rather than Rebecca, unless she's in the lead.

I've also introduce Ticket to Ride, which she wants to play again. I don't think she has a realistic chance to win (without deliberately throwing the game), so I'm pushing Settlers for now.

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Harold:

Brian, how old is your daughter? I have a five and a half year old son that I've been introducing to boardgames. He really likes Heroscape with the basic rules and I've been thinking of trying Settlers. He'd need some help, likely. Being a parent uses up a lot of my gaming time and I'm hoping to kill two birds with one stone.

1.9.2006 6:47pm

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Brian (www):

She's 6 1/2.

1.9.2006 8:23pm

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Tom Lehmann (mail) (www):

I've played lots of different games with young gamers over the years. The issue of competing on equal terms can be tough to solve. I really don't like "throwing" games, but I am more than willing to handicap games to even the playing field. For example, when a friend's son was around 10, he liked Ricochet Robots but couldn't compete with his father and me until we gave him a 30 second "peek" at the next chip before it was flipped over for all to see and his VP chips counted double. These rules produced very close games. If the best solution was easy and he could find it in 30 seconds, then he just scored 2 points. But, it often wasn't and he could still, with his extra time, sometimes beat us to the punch... which was very satisfying for him.

1.9.2006 9:35pm

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Brian (www):

I don't like throwing games either, which is why I'm leaning towards Settlers (when we have three). It is tough to bite my tongue when She makes terrible plays. Sometimes I do, but I'm mainly trying to explain things ... which annoys her (rightfully so).

1.9.2006 9:47pm

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Harold:

It's nice to have a game where they can compete without help. The way they're going to learn strategy is through trying things and seeing the consequences. I'm trying to teach my son to lose gracefully (with mixed success so far).

1.9.2006 10:02pm

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Jon (mail):

Cool! So what has she played before now? I've been playing games with my daughter since she was 2 and a half and she's 4 and a half now. (I made a few geeklists: Games I've Played With My Three-Year-Old Daughter and Games I've Played With My Four-Year-Old Daughter.) My wife and I have been teaching good sportsmanship (gamemanship?) by modeling good behavior and saying "congratulations" when she wins. When I first said it and she asked what it meant, I said it meant that I was happy that she won. She asked why and I told her it was because I loved her and wanted her to do well.

1.9.2006 10:10pm

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Tom Lehmann (mail) (www):

Ah, yes, the joys of teaching good sportmanship to children! ;-) A very good approach, similar to what some friends of mine, who are into Martial Arts, did by saying "good fall!" whenever their baby would fall down and not hurt herself in any real way (they would also take their baby to Martials Arts, where she could watch adults falling safely all the time). The result, a kid who no longer screams automatically when she falls down...

My blog is mostly not game-related, but I did post an entry on "educational" games, in which I mentioned learning to lose gracefully as one of the educational benefits of playing strategy games. I later posted that essay on my web page. Here's the URL:

http://web.hypersurf.com/~tlehmann/edgames.html

1.10.2006 8:24pm

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Jon (mail):

Nice essay! There is a lot to say about playing games with children. I'd like to see a book on the subject, maybe a collaboration....

1.10.2006 9:30pm

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