Dear The Mob,
I know times are tough all around, so I'm offering you a business suggestion. I suggest you offer computer protection. Affordably priced, say $100 a year. But, you protest, "I am just a humble businessman, and am befuddled by computers, as much as the next honest entrepreneur."
I know. I know.
What would I expect for $100? Sympathy. I'd call you up, and say "Mr. Honest Businessman, some bastard of a hacker snuck a virus onto my system, and now I'm getting pop-up ads offering to help me work at home earning a degree in computer art to design advertisements that offer to Make. Her. Ecstatic."
You would reply "That sounds terrible," and listen while I bitch about the 10 hours lost cleaning up my system. Believe me, a sympathetic listener is worth the money.
We will both be shocked and saddened to hear about that young hacker's suicide, via a silenced pistol to his temple. Such a tragedy. No doubt we will commiserate about the troubled state of modern society, leading a troubled young person towards a life of idle crime and destruction, which spiraled inevitably to self-destruction.
Signed, One of many
P.S. For now, I will get my sympathy via Malware-bytes, which will be getting some of my money, assuming that my computer is still working in a month. Technically quite proficient, but not nearly as sociable.